Sunday, March 4, 2012

Liberty Enlightening the World


I was handed a little package about two inches high. Patriotic lettering announced it as COLORED GROWING, but it didn't fool me. Why it's Liberty Enlightening the World, America's favorite colossal statue.

Here's a better look at it. If you click only one image, to enlarge, this is the one to click. Check out the texture.

Now take a better look at the card.

COLORED GROWING. DO NOT SWALLOW. EXPAND 600% OF SIZE. Yes, it's dangerous. That is how you get people's attention. If you swallow this miniature statue, it becomes six times its size and explodes your intestines!

There's more on the back.

Again, its name seems to be Colored Growing, and again, we are alerted DO NOT SWALLOW.

The temperature of the water is under 35° C. What water? See step 2. I recognized the work of the Direction Writing Cartel. They almost got me again.

Amazing fun and an educational experience. My daughter has learned her New York attitude well. "What am I gonna learn from this?" she wanted to know.

Actually you should click on that one too, and look at the lower left, to see the symbol of the unhappy toddler who is not allowed to have amazing fun and an educational experience.


I always like a combination of fun and education myself. And I laugh at danger. Taking care not to swallow anything, I looked around for a container that would hold water.

The 600% enlargement concerned me. My first choice was a sink. After an hour or so, I realized that this meant we couldn't wash our hands while using what is after all called a washroom, so I transferred Colored Growing to a large spaghetti pot.

I checked the card again. 72 hours? Seriously? No wonder it looked like not much had happened after just one seventy-second of that time. Do not expect instant results.

The next morning, the replica was undeniably larger than it had been. When I picked it up, some of the paint flaked off and fell into the water. The base was rippled and warped. It looked pretty grotesque. But then, it had not even been a full 24 hours yet. I just needed to have faith.

Then we noticed one of the cats drinking from the pot instead of the nice clean water we provide them three feet away. The pot has a lid. I put it on. The magic would proceed in darkness.

The next images were captured generously more than 72 hours after the start of the experiment. But it says after 72 hours, not at exactly 72 hours, and I maintain that eight days is in fact after 72 hours.

Here is the pot.

I don't know what the white stuff is and ignorance is bliss. I know that the dark stuff at the bottom is paint that flaked off, mostly from the base of the statue.

But of course you don't get the scale from that picture. I was thinking ahead that I would put a ruler in the pictures, but in my excitement I forgot.

That's OK though. I had been provided with two copies of Colored Growing, so all we need to do to appreciate the transformation is place them side by side, before and after.

The educational thing I got out of this experience is that 600% means double the height, when you convert from meters.

I held the larger Colored Growing for her closeup.

She's getting ready to swing that torch at me. So I have nothing to lose by adding the sexy rear view of her and her little sister.

There. I did have amazing fun after all.

I wonder whether that pot will come clean.


1 comment:

  1. Well, twice as high, twice as wide, twice as deep. Six times the fun, education, color, and growth. Sounds like 600% to me.

    Have you measured the cat since it drank the water?

    And finally, when did that sweet daughter of yours get so cynical?